The Elf (2017)

After random scenes of a toymaker, we jarringly head to present day where a young woman enters a shop and is soon followed by a young man. Who are they? Do they own this shop? I mean, I assume it's a shop because the guy walked in a glass door and the interior looks like a second hand store.  Did the toy maker own a second hand store? What is going on?  There's no context.

It is later established that Nick and his girlfriend Victoria were at a toy shop. It is not clear how this is a toy shop since there was a severe lack of toys. I saw cards, Cd's, clothing, paper products, and old photographs -  everything except toys.

When Victoria finds photos of kids with dolls, she freaks out. The photos span a number of years and she believes it's the same toy in all the photos. I'm not sure why she'd make that assumption. If someone makes toy trains, and you see multiple kids over a span of 90 years with a toy train, you don't just scream, "oh my god the same train is in all these photos!" You assume they all have trains made by the same toymaker.

Nick goes into a dark room with a Christmas theme and finds a box with a cursed elf. Of course he does. Victoria talks on the phone to a friend and wonders where Nick is. There's discussion of a Christmas party so I guess it's Christmas time. But there's no snow and nothing yet to clue us in that it's the holiday season.

It's hard to tell what is going on in this film as there are only brief clues about who the characters are  and no exposition. At one point, Victoria says to her friend,"You know how Nick feels about this time of year. " No. No we don't. We don't have a clue about how Nick feels because no ones told us anything about him.  So is she saying he has issues with Christmas? If so, why is he in the Christmas room feeling an elf?

If Nick has holiday issues, then Victoria is extremely insensitive.  She's decorated the interior of their house with strings of Christmas lights, and has neglected to tell Nick she's decided to throw a Christmas party.  Christmas is important to her, so to hell with Nicks crippling anxiety and past trauma. She wants to see her family. Oddly she's also decided to invite people she's never met from the small town that Nick seems to despise. 

The other troubling aspect of this relationship is that they've only known each other three months, they're engaged and planning marriage.  If she's already indifferent to your feelings when she's still in the infatuation stage, you've got a long road ahead of you, Nick.

Victoria tells her friend she really doesn't know anything about Nick. What is going on? Why are you marrying this guy? And where is her friend located? She's telling Victoria to come home? And why does Victoria's family drive so far  to go to a party they don't even want to go to? Argh!

Okay it is confirmed that Nick hates Christmas. There was an incident when he was a child and now he's stuck in the middle of these family holiday festivities and her family seem to hate him, for reasons unexplained?  Holy crap, run Nick, run!

Another strange incident - carolers show up at the door to sing Xmas carols. When the family say thanks but no thanks, the lead caroler turns aggressive and nastily yells, "Hey we came a long way to be here." Hey jerk, you can't just show up unannounced on peoples lawns and then get mad at them for not meeting your needs. 

As things go from bad to worse, people start dying. At one point, Victoria calls her friend back home - which is strange since she should call 911 - and says there's a killer in the home. Her friends first question is, what does he look like. Seriously? And to make things stranger, the obnoxious friend is in the drive through while on the phone and is yelling at the person working the drive through to shut up.  Idiot, don't ever mess with people who make your food.

This movie is tough to get through and if you manage to stick it out, you will not be rewarded. Watch only if you're trying to watch every Christmas related horror film that exists.