Van Helsing (2004)

Van Helsing fights Frankenstein, werewolves, Mr. Hyde, Igor, and Dracula in a botched attempt at a vampire story, with extremely distracting CGI. The problem with movies such as this is that there is so much emphasis on the cgi, and while it looks cool, it also looks fake. It is so obvious that Van Helsing is not actually interacting with Mr. Hyde that it distracts one from enjoying the scene.

As Van Helsing attempts to fight everyone under the sun, Anna and her brother make a poorly planned and ineffective werewolf trap, in which her brother is bitten. Anna is wearing makeup, has styled hair and is in high heels, but she can still run faster than a werewolf. How odd.

Poncey old Dracula walks the floor, walls, and ceilings of his castle while his winged vampire women wreak havoc on the village due to Van Helsing's interference with a sacrifice. Dracula has tons of vampire babies hanging from the ceiling in Killer Clowns From Outer Space type cocoons. He also has minions that look like the dwarfs from Phantasm.

Anna won't let Van Helsing kill her werewolf brother. When Van Helsing protests that her brother will kill people, Anna screams out the lamest excuse ever, which is that it's not his fault.

There is a triumphant musical score, people keep losing their guns, and a carriage blows up with stakes on the seat which throws the stakes into the air, skewering a vampire chick.