Wednesday, April 25, 2012

House of Bones (2010)

Sinister Sites, a ghost hunting show, has been losing viewers so the network decides to change its format.  Since reality shows are popular and cheaper to produce, they decide to send the shows host out into the field to work directly with the ghost hunters and camera crew.  The host, Quinn, is not happy about this because he's a pompous ass with slicked back hair, a pony tail, and an enormous ego.

When the crew arrives at the old house they are going to investigate, the producer is upset as it looks decidedly less spooky than when they last saw it and appears to be freshly painted.  The interior is also clean and they find food in the kitchen.  Strange since the home has been deserted since 1951.

The psychic who's been hired does not have a good feeling about the house.  But since everyone thinks shes a fake, they just ignore her and tell her to wait until the cameras are on to start her act.  The show has been on for four years, but they've never found anything paranormal.  None of them believe in ghosts or psychics.

The realtor who rented the house to them flips out when she discovers they are already inside.  When they tell her the door was unlocked when they arrived, she is skeptical.  She is also upset that they plan to stay the night since their contract states they only have five hours in the daytime inside the home.  Not only that but an overnight stay is not covered by the liability insurance.  Although she could lose her job by letting them violate the contract, she agrees to let them film overnight.

Trouble starts for the crew when Bob the PA disappears while setting up.  Then the psychic coughs up blood and says the house holds a malevolent spirit.  No one else is concerned with either of these incidents.

Once the cameras start rolling, the psychic tells of her impressions of the house.  While she does this the producer talks over her and shouts about how he loves the house, thus rendering their footage unusable.  The producer thinks everything is fake - blood spewing out the psychic, ectoplasm in the wall, a shoe stuck halfway into the wall that wasn't there when they arrived and looks just like the PAs shoe.  It all culminates in a ridiculous, harbinger from hell,  haunted house with a devil pit ending.

Stupidest dialogue:
"There's ectoplasm in the wall"
"Where did it come from?"
Producer - "The bank realtor most likely."

Seriously?  Why would a realtor ever put ectoplasm in a wall?

2 comments:

Erin said...

So, is this worse than Grave Encounters?

Chris Jart said...

Yes, it is. Grave Encounters is better. House of Bones is like one of the original movies on the Syfy channel, which for all I know, it could be.