Thursday, November 22, 2012

Two Headed Shark Attack (2012)

A college professor/boat captain takes his class on a trip to a  location several days away by boat.  The boat is not the type you would stay overnight on and there is no explanation of where they might sleep.

The professor isn't very good. He shows them a sexton which they need to do an exercise for class, but never shows them how to use it.  The class is annoyed that he wants to teach and have them to schoolwork as all they want to do is party.

They notice something up ahead in the water. But instead of slowing down or attempting to go around it, they steam full ahead and it wraps around the front of the boat.  Eventually the professor uses a spear type thing to drag it away (while the boat continues to chug forward) but the item gets caught in the propeller and damages the hull.  Good move, captain.

The class evacuates to a nearby island where they look for scrap metal to weld and repair the hull.  A kid in class has more knowledge than the professor does about everything, especially the ocean and islands.

The professor is a wimp and gets really whiny after he cuts his leg, making him even more useless than he already was.  Luckily his students know how to fix boats motors and generators. Thank god they don't have to rely on the professor.

Brooke Hogan plays a manly lady student who is not as horrible an actress as you'd think.  Most of the other characters are useless and tend to scream frequently.

Watch for the oil barrel whose top is made of cardboard painted black. Also of note: when the class are in the water talking about how the Atoll is sinking and what ever will they do, in the background you can see the rocks of the breakwater on the island behind them.  Plus when it starts to sink they do a jump cut to everyone popping up out of the water likes the island just sank quick.

Also in the ridiculous category -  if you just plunged underwater by a sinking island and need a wick to light something on fire, apparently all you need to do is wring out your t-shirt.

Oh and the two headed shark is ridiculous.  It seems to be different sizes at times.  And enjoy the inconsistent distance between boat and the shore. Sometimes the boat is way out at sea.  While other times, it is near enough to the shore that they can swim fast enough to avoid the shark.


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