Monday, September 11, 2023

Ghosts of Amityville (2022)

Olivia misses her mom who died a couple months ago in an accident. While she and her dad are heading to visit a relative, she falls asleep and has nightmares about a killer clown, who she is convinced killed her mom. 

The movie gets convoluted about ten minutes in when they arrive at a cabin by the lake and dad is called in to work. He tells his young daughter he’ll be gone for a few hours at work.  The clown shows up shortly after this. As she runs away, it’s day, then night, then day. Has dad been gone overnight?  

Just when the clown is about to catch her as she’s running through the woods, she wakes up in bed in the cabin.  What?  Has it been a dream this whole time?  Now she’s in a hotel. Is this still a dream? She calls her dad’s work but he’s not there. Inexplicably the boss demands she put her dad on the phone.

Thirty one minutes in and now we’re back in the car with dad. Screw you movie.

This is essentially a short film padded to full length.  The majority of the movie has no dialogue.  When there is dialogue, it doesn’t provide much information.  There are long scenes of driving where the camera is just shooting out the front windshield. At one point as they pulled back on the road, I started a stop watch. For four minutes the only dialogue was the father telling Olivia to go to sleep. Two of those minutes were shots out the front windshield in silence.

If you take a drink every time Olivia says dad or daddy, you’d probably die from alcohol poisoning. Also there’s a scene where the clown is after them and they can’t get the car started. It’s not clear why since they’ve had no car issues, but something that’s going to make it worse is them keeping the dome light on. It’s also going to light them up like a beacon in the darkness for the clown. Then the next day at a strategic moment, the car starts no problem. That’s not how cars work.

Ridiculous dialogue

Boss: Princess, where is your dad?
Olivia: I don’t know where my dad is.
Boss: Would you put your dad on the phone for me please?

Shining vibes
They’re both smoking but the vaper is being condescending
Okay we know what it looks like from the
back seat, but how does it look from the front?
The not so different view from the front of the car.
A crazy clown is after them, the car won’t start
but they keep their dome light on


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