So Kurt and his friend Brian fly to Australia to start filming, where it’s revealed that Kurt is a walking red flag. He tracks down Shea, an actress he met once at a party in Los Angeles, and insists she play the lead in the film. He’s written the part just for her and no one else will do. At first his super creepy stalker behavior is off putting, but when Shea reads the script, she’s in - thus perpetuating the stereotype that you just have to keep stalking someone to win them over.
Kurt, Brian, Shea, her friend, a cameraman and their driver hire a boat to take them to a remote location where they will walk into the woods to find the stomping grounds of Kurt’s ancester. When the captain warns them against going there, Kurt bristles and says his film must be authentic. Yet he’s setting the film in current day, rather than 200 years ago, and he’s got a script with pretentious dialogue that he is constantly changing to suit his whims, or madness as the case may be.
Things start to go wrong fairly quickly, as they do. Kurt manages the mind boggling task of acting like both a diva and a victim. His demands for authenticity cause him to almost push someone off a cliff in a quest for a real scream and later risk his friends life. Weird things start to happen, such as trees seemingly attacking people. As if Kurt wasn’t unlikeable enough, his behavior gets even worse and it’s unclear if it’s because he believes he’s making a masterpiece, or he is possessed.
The movie clocks in around two hours, which is way too long. The first third is Kurts efforts to get Shea into his movie. At the end the movie kind of goes Blair Witch, but you don’t care because Kurt comes off as a total dick and you hope he fails miserably.
The timeline in this film is suspect. I thought the captain said she’d come back in two days, but they spend two days walking into the forest and at least two nights. There is no way they can get back to the boat in time. Then they walk further so they are screwed. Yet no one mentions the captain said she wouldn’t come back if they aren’t at the designated pick up place. Also they are completely unorganized so I’m not sure how they expected to complete the filming.
Dialogue from a pretentious amateur who plays the victim if he doesn’t get what he wants and will never be Tarantino:
Why does she keep doing this to me?
Where were you when I needed you? You didn’t have my back.
It’s not just for me, it’s for you.
I wrote it for you, Shea.
I solemnly swear to you that I will deliver to you on my life a film that is full of truth and notes and substance and you will star in it and I will deliver it to the cinemas of the world.
Film us walking up this hill.
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| Of course Kurt is doing his vlog with the screen facing the camera |
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| Kurt was a big baby even before they went into the forest |
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