Treasure hunters Noah and Danielle are looking for the lost city of Sakar. They’ve got a map and a guide to help them. They end up in a cave covered in Halloween store spider webs. Soon after the person who hired them shows up with his minions. I don’t know what was going on because everyone was so uninteresting, but the gist of it is he’s taking over, which begs the question why did he hire them.
While we’re supposed to see Noah and Danielle as the good guys, Danielle sets the stage early as unlikeable. When Noah mentions a guide who got them coordinates to the burial chamber and then died in a booby trap, Danielle shrugs and says she wasn't that fond of him anyway. Yeah, I want to root for that person.
All the characters go back to the cave and discover ann entrance to the mummy’s tomb, Danielle finds some text and reads it out loud over and over. Noah tells her to stop chanting the evil phrase but she keeps going and the mummy is reborn. He gives her a gift but has no good will towards anyone else. Their employer’s guards start peppering the room with bullets, not understanding that mummy’s are supernatural and you should actually aim at something to avoid ricochets or killing others you don’t intend to kill.
This one was so bad I pulled the plug about half way through. I couldn’t take it. The banter between the two leads is awkward. Danielle’s clothing is right out of Tomb Raider, while Noah dresses up his outfit by wearing fingerless gloves. Their guide starts out in a brown shirt, but after he wanders off he’s wearing a white shirt. Also I don’t think the ancient civilizations had armor with abs.
Ridiculous dialogue
Every time you say that’s not possible something impossible happens.
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| Ancient Egyptians and their ab armor |
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| If she was just attacked, the blood wouldn’t be dried |
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| The spider webs from the Halloween store |
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| Our main characters |
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| He starts out in a brown shirt… |
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| But his shirt is white after he wanders off |
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