666 Demon Child (2004)

An old man walks through the desert until it’s dark. He opens a hole in a stone carving using a tiny medallion, crawls inside and finds a couple eggs.  He hauls them out and walks some more. When he tries to cross a dirt road in the middle of nowhere, he ends up under the wheels of the only vehicle around for fifty miles.

Inside the camper are six people with expertise in archaeology.  Doc found some relics on his last trip and has convinced the others to accompany him.  The artifacts were authenticated by three labs who say they are 500,000 years old.  The others say that can’t be right because there was no metal work at that time. Doc counters that only applies to humans.

When the camper hits the old man, they all run outside and he’s lying peacefully underneath as if he’s taking a nap. Two of the occupants  head off to the store nearby for help. There is no phone so they bring the man to the store and drive off to get help.  Soon they discover Daryl has stolen one of the strange large eggs and stashed it in the closet. Shortly after this, the egg cracks and Jean starts screaming, “Kill it! Kill it!” Then Daryl is killed by a demon baby. More deaths and shenanigans follow. 

This is hard to get through. The baby appears to be rubber. They have to hold it against themselves and flail to stimulate an attack. The sound of the demon baby is annoying as hell. It’s a repetitive sound of a baby doll crying mixed with other annoying sounds. 

At one point someone in the camper calls someone Greg, yet the male characters are Daryl, Stephen and Doc/Bryce. Jean is an odd character that seems to have an issue with getting blankets.  At the accident someone says gets a blanket but Jean doesn’t move and looks at Becky, who ends up getting it. Later Jean is curled up on the couch. Becky asks her if she’s still cold and does she want a blanket. She does. Good god Jean, why can’t you get a blanket?!

Ridiculous dialogue

Daryl: No one was working metal 500,000 years ago.

Doc: No humans were.

Daryl: An old man stepped out in front of us. He’s hurt pretty bad and we’re afraid to move him

Ben: You can’t leave him on the road all night.

It’s afraid of the knife.

The giants and us are related.

Anything that can survive thousands of years as an egg and then rip apart a grown man seconds after it hatches isn’t normal.

Get ready for five minutes of beautiful scenery,
an old man walking, and no dialogue 

Why so glum

This is the special effects budget

Doc and 

Getting run over by a camper looks fairly peaceful.
No blood or injury or a rip in his clothing.

Hold the demon baby and flail

Creepiest thing in the movie

Doc is going for help, yet he stops to bury someone and
then collapses from the heat. Good job Doc