Unhinged (2017)

While driving to her wedding, Melissa, her sister and two friends head down a private road which is blocked by a weirdo they saw earlier at a gas station.  When he threatens them with a machete, one girl hits him in the head and accidentally kills him.  Instead of calling the police, the stupidest girl insists no one will believe them so they need to dispose of the body. Thus ensuring that if anyone does discover he’s dead, it will surely appear to be murder.  This is the first of many bad decisions these idiots will make.

In a scene that confirms their lack of functioning brain stems, they decide to load the body in their trunk, and continue to the wedding.  When the car gets low on gas, they are in the middle of nowhere and stop at a house to get help. The owner, Miss Perkins, is understandably confused as to why they think she has gas, but invites them to stay. She has no phone, but there is a guy that stops by on Wednesday and maybe he can help them.  

Since the girls have no gas and no cell reception, they feel they have to stay. Miss Perkins tells them to keep out of the woods and as long as they respect her house rules, she’ll give them space. That night they can’t sleep and hear their host talking to some demonic voiced being in the shed.  So the next day, they leave. No, of course they don’t. It’s all down hill from there.

The bad decisions in this movie are astounding.  Why is the best option to bring the body with them?  What did they do with his car? Did they hide it, or just leave it blocking the one lane private road?  Why would they dig a grave only a couple feet deep and within view of Miss Perkins windows? Why did Melissa wait until the road trip for her wedding to pick her maid of honor?  How can she get her fiancés voicemail when there is no reception? And if the phone suddenly worked, why wouldn’t she call for help? 

And why is there only one voicemail, rather than many frantic calls asking if she’s okay?  If her fiancés first reaction when his bride, her sister and two friends disappear is assuming she doesn’t want to get married, it makes me think their relationship isn’t that great.   Your bride disappears? Yeah it may be cold feet. Your bride, her sister and two close friends disappear? Damn, sounds like foul play. And if you stop at a weird ladies house and wander into the woods, where you’ve been warned not to go, and you see a woman dressed as a bride on the staircase of an abandoned building, why would your first thought ever be, is that my friend who is getting married?  No, of course it isn’t.

Yes, lets bury the body here. No one will ever know.

Wearing rubber gloves and a wedding dress while standing
 on the staircase of an abandoned building in the woods
where you’ve been warned not to go?
Yes, it must be my friend who’s getting married.

She looks like she’s from Mordor.

Don’t go down roads with these signs, Just don’t.

Guess who’s got the bad attitude.