Now an adult, Dylan is a successful novelist. One day he's hit by a car while crossing the street. The gem from his childhood gives him some sort of super healing power and he checks himself out of the hospital without consulting his doctor.
Once home Dylan gets into the shower even though his head and half his face are covered by a bandage. By the time his wife - or girlfriend - Emily notices he's back from the hospital, his bandage is soaked with blood. There is also a massive amount of blood running down his legs and on the shower floor. Oddly enough Emily is completely unconcerned with this turn of events and joins him in the shower. The excessive blood loss is never mentioned.
Dylan abandons his novel writing to become a computer hacker. He targets corruption by using his multiple laptops. He also reconnects with his childhood friend Leah who just happened to be his doctor when he was in the hospital. He didn't recognize her until she dropped her childhood journal at a barbecue, which revealed the page written on the day they found the mushroom. Because all well adjusted adults carry around their diary from when they were eight, even in social situations.
Meanwhile supporting characters Jim and Amy are on the brink of divorce or murder. Jim is a drunk and Amy is so angry she's withholding all intimacy. Their teenage daughter thinks Dylan is dreamy so she repeatedly tries to seduce him. When she drops her towel, he runs over, grabs it and wraps it around her. The narrative is supposed to make Dylan seems like a good guy. Yet it's super creepy to run over to an exposed teen to pick up her towel, when you could just shut the bathroom door to give her privacy.
Meanwhile Dylan and Emily are having problems due to her addiction. It doesn't help that Dylan is pursuing his childhood love interest. After Dylan consummates his love with Leah, he comes home to find Emily dead in their bed from an overdose. He reacts by holding her and saying, "No! No!" Well there isn't actually any dialogue on the soundtrack but he mouths it. He doesn't check for a pulse or call 911 like a normal person.
The death of Emily leaves his schedule open so Leah moves in. Is this a day, week, month, year? No idea. At one point, they sit in his office while he eats a salad and Leah laughs. Then you realize it's not a salad. It's a pile of uncooked spinach. No dressing, no other vegetables, no nothing. It's like someone bought a bag of spinach at the supermarket and dumped it on a plate. Just another thing to add to the bewildering tone of this movie.
As if the narrative isn't crazy enough, Leah gets kidnapped, and Dylan rescues her by teleporting through the a trailer door. Then the movie ends with Dylan giving a press conference in which he calls out the corruption in politics and big business, and the big wigs take responsibility for their actions. Oh and then they all commit suicide. What the hell, movie?!
Made by the same guy who made Double Down, this follows some of the same tenets: the main character is a hacker/computer expert who is fighting for the people; a gem gives the owner magical powers; meeting the love of his life before he's ten; the actress who plays his love interest appears to be half his age even though they are the same age in the film; he gets naked and shows his butt; and nothing really makes sense.
I highly recommend checking it out. Just know what your'e getting into - it's not good, but it sure is entertaining, and isn't that the most important thing? If you like Ed Wood or Tommy Wiseau, then you should like this one.
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| It's not enough to find a mushroom, you must behold it |
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| The worst diary entry every - no context, no date, no nothing |
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| I didn't realize that when hit by a car, you land perfectly aligned |
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| Hope he doesn't really need that oxygen since they put it on over his bandage. |
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| Nothing awkward about a man leaving the hospital looking like this |
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| And we ramp up the awkwardness |
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| Shouldn't you take him back to the hospital based on the massive blood loss? |
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| Even a blood soaked bandage can't stop the passion |
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| Another awkward bandage. |
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| Passing out and spilling coffee on the keyboard is the sign of a true hacker |
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| Why yes, this is a perfectly normal way to meet with your psychiatrist. |
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| The second psychiatrist takes a different approach which is also exceedingly uncomfortable |
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| His friends teenage daughter who is totally into him |
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| This looks less like a love connection and more like a hostage situation |
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| You're using the mic holders incorrectly |
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| the green screen corruption press conference |
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