Mr. Halloween (2006)

Rumor has it that the haunted house run by Bill Loomis, aka Mr. Halloween, uses real body parts for props.  But people aren't too concerned about it since everyone in town goes there on Halloween. The local teens get creeped out walking by his house in the daytime due to the legend. Well and also  Loomis's propensity for hostile posturing, angry psycho staring and an aura of intimidation. I don't know about you, but I'm not sure I'd ever go to the crazy, angry guys haunted house.

The town has the highest number of missing children in the country, but the Sheriff isn't all that concerned about reports of missing kids and does zero investigation into Loomis.  When Jason and Michael go missing after deciding to check out the haunt, one of their friends believes Loomis is behind it.  But she can't get anyone to believe her and soon she has disappeared as well.

This was supposedly made for $6000, and while it's not good, it's better than a number of other movies I've seen.  But keep in mind what I'm really saying is that in the pantheon of crap movies, this isn't as bad as others.   The sound is sometimes drowned out by noise, and scenes in the police station are echoey due to the room being mostly empty.   The acting is more like something you'd see in a high school play and the characters do some amazingly stupid things. To be fair, I think this movie was made by teenagers or people just out of high school so that would explain a lot.

Then there are the questions that come from the non-sensical plot points. If everyone in town goes to Mr. Halloween's haunted house, then why isn't anyone ever there?  Why aren't the town's parents up in arms about their small town having the most missing children in the entire country?  How can the Sheriff still be in office when he shows no concern that kids are missing, is skeptical when kids disappear, and even says one kid must have run away because his mom is a drunken whore? How come no one notices when one of the parents disappears?  Why does no one look into the rumors that Mr. Halloween is a serial killer? And why does the Sheriff spill the beans to Jill when he could just shoot Loomis in the head and the whole thing would be done? And how come Loomis can hear someone knock on a door when he's using his weirdo blood transfusion machine, but he can't wake up when someone walks noisily into the room and pours gasoline on him? And how could the deputy be so damn stupid?

This is a bad sign - he's only in the first few
minutes but his hair goes from short to long.
Is this even the same actor?

Exciting desk sitting action

Yes, this is the Sheriff's office, not an empty store front 

Evil John Cleese is not amused

The worst Sheriff in the world peruses the posters of
 missing teens from his town and is unconcerned

Howling VI: the Freaks (1991)

How would you like to see a movie with a vampire vs. a werewolf, and it's not made for teenage girls? Sounds great, except that what you get is a a movie that's far down the Howling sequel list. So you just know it's going to be a problem.

British drifter Ian ends up in a small desert town and gets work helping the local preacher restore the church.  He stays with the family and becomes friendly with the preachers daughter Elizabeth.

When a traveling freak show comes to town, Ian and Elizabeth decide to go.  When Harker, the shows owner, sees Ian he can't put his finger on why Ian looks familiar. But after having one of the freaks trail him, Harker discovers Ian's secret and decides to make him part of the freak show.

Another Howling movie with not much werewolf in it.  There's not a lot going on in this film either.  The movie ends with a werewolf vs. vampire fight, and the vampire is ridiculous looking.  Bruce Payne is carnival owner Harker and Antonio Fargas, aka Huggy Bear, plays one of the freaks.

Howling V: The Rebirth (1989)

A vague plot about a castle re-opening after five hundred years is the basis for our fabulous Howling feature.  A small group are specially selected to go on the tour, but aren't aware that they've been carefully chosen as one of them is believed to be a werewolf.

Shortly after they arrive, a massive snow storm hits and individuals start disappearing.  Guess they should have checked a weather report since the Count and the bus driver have gotten into a fight and the bus has driven off. So everyone's trapped and a werewolf is on the loose. I hope he eats the guy with the bad haircut first.

This is similar to Agatha Christie's book, Ten Little Indians, where everyone is trapped in a house cut off from the rest of the world and one of the guests is a killer - except Christie's story didn't involve a werewolf.  There's not much werewolf in this film either, since the kills are done off screen and most of the werewolf action is glimpsed through cracks or from secret passages. So if you want to see the werewolf, you'll be severely disappointed.

It's okay, but forgettable.  All three of us had seen this movie before and two of us couldn't remember much about it. I've seen it multiple times and couldn't remember who the werewolf was.

Self Storage (2013)

Jake lives in a boat in he yard at the self storage facility where he works as a guard. One day he overhears his boss having a conversation with another guard in which he learns they'll be shutting the facility down that night and he'll be out of a job.  Angry at this turn of events, Jake invites his friends to a party at the storage locker where he has a pseudo living room.

When he short circuits the power to the electric fence so that he can let them in, an emergency auxiliary system activates in one of the storage lockers where the owner is working a black market organ harvesting operation.  For a reason that is never explained, the organ donors are all strapped to tiled walls, complete with shower heads which dispense acid that dissolves bone.  Ah yes, the one fatal flaw in their get rich quick organ harvesting plan was that they stored the donors under the acid showers.

Well what's an organ harvester to do on the night of his biggest sale ever with a buyer already on the way top pick up the now non-existent organs?  Well luckily Jack and his friends are right there, drunk, stupid and incredibly annoying, so you'll be glad to see horror favorite Michael Berryman target them.

There's a ton of padding in this movie where you're stuck watching these idiots party, and you'll absolutely hate the guy who wears his baseball cap at a rakish angle, has a charcoal hobo beard, and looks like he could be the rebel in a boy band. Also surprising is that this film was able to hire Eric Roberts as the owner.

Within the Woods (2005)

Oh damn, the clown is back?  Yup, even though this is the third installment, they didn't reference Camp Blood in the title.  Well, the good news is that Trisha, our female lead in the first two, isn't in this one.

A reality show is sending a group of college students to the sight of the murders. They must spend twenty four hours there and whoever hasn't left at the end of this time period gets to split one million dollars.

The producer has placed over a dozen cameras in the woods to film their every move. Well, at least as many moves as a dozen cameras can capture in a large wooded area. In fact it often seems like people have to randomly wander off the trail to even appear on camera. Good job, guys.

Of course it's not that easy to win the million dollars since the producer and his two person crew have set up various things to spook the kids, including someone dressed as a clown.  But oh damn, the killer clown is back and he don't take kindly to people imitating him or kids fornicating in his killing spot.  Why do kids in movies always want to have sex at the exact spot of some horrible murder? Weird. Another question is that since one of the guys has a black belt in Aikido, why can't he beat up a slow moving clown?

The contestants are annoying, the sound is inconsistent, the killers last words are drowned out by background noise, and the last scene is ridiculous. Oh ha ha, I look back so fondly on that time everyone got killed and I was trapped by the killer and would have been slaughtered except for one lucky break. Good times.

Camp Blood 2 (2000)

A year after the murder of her friends at Camp Blood, Trisha is approached by Milligan, a filmmaker who wants her to be an advisor on the movie he is making about the murders.  Trisha is a ward of the state and still locked in a padded room so it doesn't seem the best option for her mental health.  But next thing you know Trisha is released and working on the film.  No one shall question how Milligan was able to gain official custody of Trisha or why the Doctors at the asylum would release her.

On the first day of shooting, Trisha is surprised to find out that they are going to the actual sight of the murders and camping there overnight. Oh yeah, that sounds like a great idea, especially since you had to spring her from the nuthouse and police blame her for the murders. Again, no one shall question why a woman who is believed to be a mass murderer is able to get out of a mental institution.

The camera guy thinks it's funny to dress up in a clown mask and jump out at her.  The weird thing is that everyone thinks Trisha is over reacting rather than wondering why the guy is such a dick. But to be fair Trisha, or more accurately her psychiatrist, doesn't have seem to have thought this through since she's going to be seeing fake blood and a clown mask at the murder scene. Of course they don't even get through the first night without something going horribly wrong, and we're off on the murder express.

Be prepared for a recap of the first movie, more bad running by our lead actress, some strange sound effects, and an incredibly obvious killer. This might be worse than the first movie.

What a clown sees from the inside of his mask

Sight of the murder? Clown mask? Time to run.

Yeah, still need to work on that running style

The scariest thing in the movie - drawn on eyebrows 

Always good to have exposed wires and electrical
outlets in a padded cell... that isn't padded

Are we not supposed to notice that the psychiatric hospital...

...appears to be the same place she stays once released? 

No one shall ask why Trisha doesn't notice the new actress
looks just like the guide from her deadly camping trip

Camp Blood (2000)

I had heard bad things about Camp Blood, but decided to give it a try when I heard there was a Camp Blood trilogy. I don't think that was the best idea, but at least now I don't have to wonder how bad it is anymore.

Trisha and her friends decide to hire a guide and go camping in an isolated area. On the way there, they ask for directions from a guy walking in the middle of nowhere who tells them the legend of Camp Blood and warns them not to camp there.  You'd think they would put a little effort into where they went camping, but then again Jay is an angry asshole so maybe he didn't care.

Later that night, as they tell ghost stories around the fire, their guide tells them that it just happens to be the 20th anniversary of the Camp Blood massacre, and they are camped right on the very spot that it occurred.  The story is that someone came home early, caught their wife in bed with someone else, put on a clown mask, marched them both out into the woods and killed them.  No one shall ask why the killer kept a clown mask on the seat of his seat.

So now it's only a matter of time until the clown comes back and the death starts flying. The characters are either annoying or bland. Trisha runs like a middle aged soccer mom, wears baggy Mom jeans, spends half her time looking scared, and screams... over and over and over.  This one was difficult to get through.  But what I really want to know is why do women get topless for this type of movie? 

Poor paste job and odd headline font on the fake newspaper. 

Trisha wonders if this is a good place to camp.

Faces of impending doom

The sign of a low budget movie is having to hold the
machete so it doesn't fall out of your head after you die.

Get used to seeing this face. And what's up with the eyebrows?

Nobody notices the killer clown five feet to the side.

The Bagman (2002)

Oh boy, you know you're in for a a treat as soon as you see the sad font used for the title.

Teenage Sue and her friends are picking on classmate Jack who was burned in a fire. To be clear about how unsympathetic these characters are, they are picking on a kid who survived a fire that burned his house to the ground and killed both his parents. Yes, they're tormenting an orphaned, homeless kid with skin grafts.

As they chase Jack through the woods shouting threats at him, Sue say they should leave him alone. But she doesn't do anything to stop bully Randy from putting a burlap bag over his head and killing him.  Once Jack's body disappears in the river, the gang swears to keep their murderous secret.

Ten years later, Sue is arguing with her boyfriend over her career choice and decides to move back to her home town.  No one shall ask her boyfriend is never mentioned or seen again (psst, it appears he's only in it to have an excuse for some uncomfortable sex scenes on the stove).

Sue hooks up with the old gang who act like they're still in high school.  They want to go to the cemetery after watching scary movies because it's Friday the 13th.  Then a couple disappear to have sex in the bedroom, which is awkward but you know they're going to die because that's the horror movie code.

When the old gang starts being killed by someone with bag over head, Sue tries to determine who it is - did Jack somehow survive? Is it his ghost? Or is someone else getting revenge? Unfortunately it's just a sad, sad little movie, and the Bagman on the cover is far more menacing than the actual man in the film who has a burlap bag which is a shapeless mess with holes ripped in it. So imagine that on his head and an old trench coat worn by an obese, slow walking man and you've got the killer. Oooo, isn't it scary, kids?

This font should never be used

It's so hard being a teenager.

Sue's questionable taste in decor includes a collectible 
plate collection on her wall and red bows on her lamps.

Randy may be a cop, but he's not
good at spotting men in drag.

Nice wig and mustache

Always make sure the prop guys don't use wrinkled
cardboard to make the fake machetes.

Confusion reigns as this is teenage Randy
at the beginning of the film...

...and this is teenage Randy during the flashback
at the end of the film. Huh?

Donner Pass (2012)

There's a legend in these parts about the Donner Party and the power of eating living flesh. Wait I hear you saying, the Donner Party only ate flesh from those who were already dead. So let's call this poetic license in order to ramp up the scare factor and warp the impressionable minds of people who don't have a clue about the actual Donner Party.

Thomas invites his friend Mikey, Mikey's girlfriend Haley, and her friend Nicole to his parents cabin for the weekend.  I'm not sure if Haley's friends are all jerks, but Nicole is rude and annoying, plus she invites some cool kids to the cabin so they can party.

When Thomas asks the uninvited guests to leave, it doesn't go well.  Seriously, what always happens when an unpopular kid asks the popular kids to stop doing something?  Yup, they ignore and intimidate him. It doesn't help that Mikey wants to be cool so he sides with the popular kids.  Mikey even tells Thomas that this  will work out great because then the popular guys will owe him a favor. Yeah, that's realistic.  You can just hear the words, "Dude, we did you a favor by being at your stupid party" hanging in the air.

After some lame-o alpha male type fun, there is a break in the action as a few people decide to go to sleep. Mikey is such an idiot that he blows off his girlfriend to hang out, get drunk, and be a target in a snowball game. Then he's surprised when Haley is mad.

Soon there's a killer on the loose. People disappear. People die. Oh no who could it be. Oh my god there's a twist.  Since I don't care about any of the characters, none of it mattered.  Thomas reminded me of Andrew McCarthy in his early years when he did the uncool, nice guy, sympathetic character. But since I didn't care about him either, it's just an observation.

Netherworld (1992)

Corey inherits an estate in Louisiana from the father he never met, along with a letter asking Corey to resurrect him from the dead.  The letter mentions Delores the prostitute who can store souls in the bodies of birds. Yup, nothing insane about that.  The letter then delves into his fathers sexual escapades. Good god, I can't believe he kept reading it. No one wants to know about their parents sex lives, plus good old Dad doesn't exactly sound sane when he's talking about a lady of the night who can store souls in a canary.

Corey feels the need to go to local cat house Tonk's Place which looks like something right out of Road House and is conveniently located right next door to his new estate.  While Corey cosies up to the bar and gets friendly with the hos, what he doesn't realize is that.... holy cow, is that Edgar Winter playing sax in the house band? Yes. Yes, it is. Well there you go. I guess if Edgar Winter plays his sweet witchy sax music any young buck will consider sleeping with the same prostitute frequented by his dead father. Blurgh!

So you can watch this for Edgar Winter. Or you can watch it for the big stone hand that detaches itself from the wall, flies down hallways until it finds it's intended victim and then sinks it's big stone fingers into their heads. Yikes! The hand is what is depicted on the cover, but it looks better in the movie.

This is a Full Moon movie, but it seems to have a bigger budget than more recent films. I'm not a Full Moon fan, but this was okay even if the plot was pretty stupid.

Burke and Hare (2010)

Based on some real life murderers, this black comedy tells the story of William Burke and William Hare, two down on their luck friends who begin digging up corpses due to the need for cadavers at one of the local medical schools.  When they run out of fresh corpses, their only option in continuing their  profitable business is to venture into the realm of murder.

There are a few laugh out loud moments, but it's not as funny as I expected. Simon Pegg plays Burke and is likable, which is a credit to the script and Pegg since he's playing a murderer.  Tim Curry is fantastic as Dr. Munro, a surgeon at the medical school who does some questionable procedures.

World War Z (2013)

Brad Pitt and his family get in their car, start driving, and find the zombie apocalypse has begun. Thankfully Brad used to work for the military and even when running from a zombie horde, he is smart enough to look back, focus on one person who is bitten and count how many seconds it takes for the person to turn. How did he know the person was turning due to a bite? Why did  he start counting? No idea, I guess it's his super secret military training.

Brad and his family are evacuated from the infected zone to a ship off the coast where the zombie strategy task force is plotting how to regain control of the world and stop the zombie scourge.  After being told his family will be put off the ship unless he comes out of retirement and helps them, he agrees.

He travels to Thailand, if I remember correctly, where everything is fine until his wife - who sadly enough is not as pretty as he is -  calls him on his cell phone, which alerts the zombies to his location and ensures that a number of the men helping him will die. Good god, woman! How could you be so stupid as to call someone in a zombie zone?  More importantly, how could Brad not have turned his phone to vibrate before entering the zombie zone? Stupid man.

There are some nice effects, such as the zombies piling on top of each other to get into a walled city, and the make up looks nice.  It's a decent movie, but I guess my expectations were too high because I'd heard how great it was. It was good and I enjoyed it, but it's never going to be one of my favorites. I do give it credit for starting the action about five minutes into the film. I'm sure I'll watch it again sometime.

As usual, we are asked to overlook things such as a plane crash in which only one seat is left intact, people in the zombie zone who aren't careful enough not to kick things or make noise, cutting through an arm with one slash of a blade, and surviving an amputated hand without any pain medication and still being able to walk from the plane crash through town to the experimental lab.  Dang!

FDR: American Badass (2012)

I love history, and I love movies that take historical figures and put them in ridiculous situations with monsters. Well, I may not love the movie itself, but I'm all for the premise. I was excited about the Abraham Lincoln movies, which didn't live up to their titles, and now we've got one about FDR.  Hurray!

In an incredibly ludicrous plot, Franklin Delano Roosevelt is bitten by a werewolf and gets polio.  With his useless little polio legs, FDR finds his wife will no longer sleep in the same bed with him, but it doesn't stop him from running for president and addressing the nation with a series of tough talking radio speeches.

Meanwhile the leaders of Axis of Evil - Hitler, Mussolini, and Hirohito -  turn out to be werewolves, who decide to bring the U.S. to it's knees by putting werewolf blood in imported beer and liquor.  But FDR is one ass kicking, werewolf fighting mother and with Albert Einstein, Douglas MacArthur and a crazy wheelchair of death, there is no way to stop him. Hurrah for FDR!

The first scene in this movie when the werewolf shows up, chases FDR and his hunting party, and bites  him was so hilarious that I proclaimed it the best movie I'd ever seen. My friends were also in hysterics but one pointed out there's no way they'd be able to keep this up.  Sadly, that was a prophetic statement. What started out as the best movie ever became a terrible movie by the end.  While there were laughs to be had throughout, the movie is full of jokes you can see coming a mile away, plus a multitude of scatological and sexual jokes that would be really funny if I were a fifteen year old boy.

I did like the cuts between scenes using the presidential seal which were right out of 1960s Batman, complete with similar music, and Barry Bostwick hams it up and does a great job.

Cursed (2005)

Ellie and her younger brother Jimmy get into a car accident after a large animal runs out in front of their car.  While trying to help the other driver, whose car rolled down an embankment, the two are bitten by an large wolf-like animal who kills the other driver.

Jimmy begins to believe that the creature they ran into was a werewolf, but Ellie thinks that's ridiculous.  She's more concerned with her boyfriend Jake, who is opening a new club and who she just found out has a reputation with the ladies.  Jessie has his own problems also since he's not very popular at high school and keeps getting picked on by some guys on the wrestling team.

While each is grappling with their own problems, they find themselves becoming more assertive and more confident.  But they also find strange things happening to them, such as being able to smell blood over long distances.

Cursed gets a real beating in the reviews I've seen, but I enjoyed it. If you're looking for something scary, you'll be disappointed. But if you just want a fun little movie to watch some rainy afternoon, it's good viewing.

The Black Waters of Echo's Pond (2009)

In 1920s Turkey, archaeologists uncover hieroglyphics that speak of pandemonium and tell how to build an elaborate board game.  Once they build the game, horrible things happen and the lone survivor hides it away so that it can never hurt anyone again.  As in all horror movies, he should have chopped the offending item into pieces and burned it.

In the present, a bunch of friends decide to go away for the weekend and head to an island where the only other person there is the caretaker.  When the electricity goes out the first night, one of the guys goes into the basement to find the fuse box, falls through the stairs, and finds a board game hidden there.

The gang decides to play the elaborately carved game and soon their secrets, as well as their hidden grudges, are revealed through the game.  When are people going to learn that if you're vacationing in a remote location and you're going to spend the next few days together, you don't get anywhere near truth or dare type of games.

Not only does everyone get mad at another in the group, but the evil in the game tends to turn people into black eyed killers who take their revenge for real or imagined offenses.  Robert Patrick is the caretaker and even though his role is small, he's the most enjoyable thing here.  Otherwise it's a fairly generic movie which reminds me of something else I've seen where kids find a game that turns out to be cursed and kills them all. Damn it, kids - don't play those games!

Also listen for the continuity error when Patrick says he'll go to the mainland to get fuses, but earlier in the film when the kids went into the basement, it was obvious they had circuit breakers.

The Mole Man of Belmont Avenue (2013)

A few years after inheriting their mothers apartment building, brothers Marion and Jarmon have lost most of their tenants, are stealing electricity from the church next door, and now pets in their building are going missing.  This is little more than an irritant due to the tenants complaints until they run into a creature in the hallway absconding with one of the tenants dogs.

When the creature, who they determine is a Mole Man, disappears into the duct work, the brothers try to figure out what to do with this unexpected problem.  They don't want the police involved due to the multiple code violations, and the prohibition era bar still functioning in the basement, (although no one ever goes there anymore).

They decide to resolve the issue themselves, which is a really bad idea since their plan to stock up on pets at a local humane shelter goes horribly wrong, and the Mole Man graduates to bigger prey.  There are a fair amount of scenes with a group of stoners and Robert Englund has a small role as a tenant.

This horror comedy falls into that zone where the comedy usually falls flat and there really isn't any horror.  It's well shot,  but it seems to go on forever.  A friend of mine described it best - if this was done by one of your friends or some local filmmaker, you'd think it was pretty good.

C.H.U.D. II: Bud the Chud (1988)

For anyone who doesn't know, C.H.U.D. stands for Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dweller, which would make sense based on the cover, as well as the previous movie which took place in the New York underground. However this movie takes place in a small town, only has one Chud, and is a horror comedy.  So if you haven't seen the first one, it's not that big a deal because it's a sequel in name only.

In a highly improbable turn of events, brainy Kevin and wise guy Steve accidentally bump into a gurney with a corpse that their high school science teacher is planning to have them study the next day. (I love how the teacher left an unrefrigerated corpse in a back room with only a sheet over it). The gurney careens off the loading dock of the school, flies down the street and disappears.

While trying to figure out how to tell their teacher they lost the corpse, Steve comes up with the idea of getting another one to replace it.  So along with their friend Katie, they drive up to the Center for Disease Control and steal a corpse from a sealed bubble. Unfortunately it turns out to be the last Chud on Earth who was put in a deep freeze for future study.

While trying to smuggle it into the Steve's home and find a place to keep it without anyone noticing, they accidentally reanimate it.  Mulleted Steve thinks they're bound to get some sort of prize for such a great scientific discovery, but Kevin isn't so sure it's a good idea to keep it. Before they know it, Bud the Chud has escaped and is causing havoc all over town.

When the government discovers the theft, they send the military after the teens since they have been experimenting on Bud with illegal neuro-toxins in an attempt to make an undead warrior.  Isn't that always the way?  But

I was expecting a horror movie since the first one was not a comedy.  So it was a disappointment when Steve started acting like the wisecracking, clean cut, semi-bad boy of the film.  He spends a lot of time spouting off typical teen comedy style jokes which had me rolling my eyes.  But I have to admit there were other things in the movie that surprisingly made me laugh.  Plus it has Robert Vaughn as the Colonel and a scene with a poodle eating a mailman. This involves the little dog launching through the air like something out of Monty Python. It definitely looks funny to see a tiny poodle dragging a  screaming mailman off into the bushes.

Short Cut Road (2003)

Oh hell no.... is what I thought as soon as the movie started. It's a shot on video film done with one camera and sound that is often overpowered by ambient noise. Most of the movie takes place at night. The scenes that are lit, appear to have light provide by car head lights - in other words, no lighting was used.

Jim and his girlfriend pick up their friends to go to this years Rock Stock festival.  Jim, who also goes by Jimbo, wears a stupid hat and I hate him. In fact I don't like any of these characters so I don't particularly care when they die.

The gang spends the day driving to Rock Stock, (which turns out to essentially be guerrilla filming at a local fair).  They arrive 15 minutes before the show starts, but take their time wandering around the carnival even though it's supposed to be this huge event.  As the Sheriff says when he calls in one of the Deputy's on his day off, "The crowd is going to be a lot bigger this year.  That one band that all the kids like is performing...."  Aaaarrrggghhhh!!!

Most of the movie consists of people sitting around at the fair or driving and walking down a dirt road which is a short cut that they used the year before.  The scenes of the kids at the festival feature lots of empty space, a few shots of a far away stage on the other side of a chain link fence (complete with some older folks in lawn chairs), and absolutely no music.

Now Short Cut Road is a great title since you know that anytime someone in a horror movie takes a short cut they're going to be greeted with death.  But holy cow, this is a hard movie to watch. It's not interesting and the effects are minimal since all kills are done off screen. Plus the whole reason for everything that happens is revealed in exposition because there is no way in hell we would ever know why this movie existed otherwise.  Also I have to admit I couldn't take watching every scene and fast forwarded through some of it.

Not a good start

This is some of the best lighting in the film

Jimbo and his stupid hat

The incredible Rock Stock-can they ever find a place to sit?

Slaughter High (1985)

Oh high school... where the popular kids torment anyone who is different and fail to realize that in the real world no one cares if you were popular in high school.  Dorky Marty falls for popular Carol who brings him to the girls locker room so they can fool around. Well  that's what she tells him, but Carol is just setting him up for a prank. Yes, and what a great prank it is. No need to worry about causing  psychological harm or care about others feelings.

During the prank (why is tormenting someone referred to as a prank?) Marty ends up naked while one of the kids video tapes his humiliation and the rest of the group laugh and manhandle him.  The bullying only stops when the Coach makes them leave Marty alone and has the group report to the gym. In typical blame the victim mentality, the group decides their punishment is all Marty's fault.

I forgot to mention it's April Fools day so there are more pranks in store for poor Mary.  Unfortunately they involve Nitric Acid and a subsequent explosion in the chemistry lab where Marty is working on an experiment.  Oh those popular kids, what cards!

Years later everyone receives an invitation to a school reunion.  When they arrive at the school, it appears abandoned and no one else is around.  The group sits around drinking until after dark waiting for someone else to show up.  When no one does, they decide to break into the building, which should be a sign that there is no reunion but this group isn't too bright.

Theystumble through multiple dark hallways filled with cobwebs and find a room with refreshments, their old lockers, 8x 10 head shots, Marty's yearbooks, and a welcome banner.  No one shall ask why they aren't totally creeped out by this or why they don't immediately try to leave. As with most horror movies, this lack of cranial functioning proves to be their undoing.

Why is it whenever people are in an abandoned building, some girl has to take a shower?  Even if she gets dirty, why would she shower in an abandoned building? And where does she get soap?  Also since when does April Fools day end at noon?  And who designed Carol's hideous white outfit which has a mass of extra fabric lying in folds and hanging off her hips. Geez, that is not a good idea for anyone to wear.  Also of note, there is full frontal male nudity, which always catches me off guard since I don't ever expect it.