Monday, August 25, 2014

Blood Shed (2104)

Grumpy Gabriel lives in his car, is out of seizure medication, grimaces a lot, and receives an envelope with a key to his deceased parents storage unit.  There's not much of interest in the unit except for a trunk, and Gabriel doesn't have the key.

The storage facility has a number of homeless people living in it. Most of them are extremely annoying.  Gabriel sneaks into the facility at night work on getting the lock off the trunk. No one shall ask why he brings a hacksaw rather than a bolt cutter.  Lock 1, Gabriel 0.

In another plot line that will soon intersect, the ghost of a young woman is killing people who live in the storage facility. If any of them are pregnant,  she drags them to captivity in her basement lair. The not so convincing pregnant stomachs appear to have the texture of an orange. The women also end up covered in what appears to be tar, but just can't be.

After discovering Gabriel inside again, the Russian creep who owns the facility locks it up for the night, trapping Gabriel, the homeless, his office assistant and her friend inside.  Good luck with the ghost.

The first thing I expected based on the title of this movie was a shed.   Instead the movie takes place in a facility where people rent storage units.  I kept waiting for a shed until one of the characters told another to get out of her shed. So I guess it's a regional expression.

The movie is similar to many recent movies where people wander around without much dialogue, and then when the dialogue starts, you wish they'd shut their mouths. Also there is surprisingly little blood in the blood shed.  And why does Gabriel keep sniffing?  Does he have a cold, allergies, too much coke, or is it some sort of acting that is way off base?

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