Friday, May 29, 2015

Star Slammer (1986)

aka Prison Ship

When scantily clad miner Taura tries to protect the space crystals that her midget friends have mined, she inadvertently causes villain Bantor to lose his hand. Based on this wrong doing, the head of John Carradine that floats in space sentences Taura to a number of years in the prison ship in outer space, aka the Star Slammer.

The ship is inhabited by various prisoners who welcome Taura by slapping her around and threatening her.  The warden is an old lady with unnaturally brown hair and a low cut leather outfit. Her assistant is a woman with an eye patch.  While you would think a prison ship would hold a lot of prisoners, there's hardly anyone on board.

Taura and the girls end up bonding, as they do, and work together to fight a monster that will be familiar to anyone who's seen The Deadly Spawn.  Aldo Ray shows up for a short time to make half hearted threats, and Ross Hagen chews the scenery as Bantor.  (I swear that suit Hagen wears is in another Fred Olen Ray movie).

While I thought this would be a good cheesy 80s sci-fi flick,  it was a tame woman's prison movie.  The outer space aspect of it didn't really factor into it other than trying to get sci-fi fans to think it might be exciting.  But sadly enough, it was boring. There where a few amusing scenes, but it wasn't the fun movie I expected.

You know it's low budget when the midgets are wearing
pots and pans upon their heads.
Car... of the future!
The floating head of John Carradine says hello.
Nothing awkward about this.
The unnecessarily elaborate stocks.
The Deadly Spawn... in space
This might be the entire space ship prison population.
This looks like a really awkward costume party.
Space age special effects.
She's been in space so long, her perm's grown out.

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