Monday, June 24, 2013

Ice Spiders (2007)

Patrick Mudoon must insist on having Spiders in all his movies. Yesterday it was Spiders and today it's Ice Spiders.

Muldoon is Dash, a former Olympic skier whose ski accident  shattered his leg and ended his Olympic dreams.  Now he's a ski instructor at a resort where a high school team of Olympic hopefuls come to work on their skiing.

Unfortunately they picked the one ski resort that's right next to  a super secret government laboratory which is experimenting with spiders for defense purposes. (Upon hearing that, my first thought was spiders are going to fight our battles for us. But instead they mean to use their webs as it is the strongest fiber on Earth.)  The problem is the spiders have escaped and they're all out of food.

Oh lordy, what now? It's time for the crack rescue squad of military to save the day, except they're not so much interested in rescuing people as they are in saving the spiders for further research.

Ridiculous dialogue-

"Giant spiders with roid rage. That's a nice experiment, doc." - Dash

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